24) nuclear winter is here

My December to Remember II: Day Twenty-Four

News: Christmas Eve forecasted to be the coldest on record in America.
Twitter Files Round Nine(?) reveal more American three-letter agencies deeply embedded in censorship efforts. FBI merely a vessel opening the door to the CIA, the DOD, and OGA’s (other government agencies).
Riots in Paris stretch into second day.

This isn’t being blackpilled. I’ve gone far beyond that. Something entirely new has arisen that I somehow always knew was simmering right below the surface. It’s like everything I’ve been thinking the past five or so years has been affirmed, and now there’s no choice but to sit with it. My trust in literally everything I grew up knowing has been completely blown, exploded in a hailstorm of corruption and greed, tainted by the worst humanity has to offer.

And yet, there’s such peace I feel as I watch the fallout from what was, and will never be again.

Sub-zero zen.

I’ve always been a rebel. I get it from my mother. She always went against the grain, doing what she wanted to do, not what anyone else told her to. It’s why it makes complete sense that as she ages and her dementia worsens, her sisters are trying to step in and control how my father and I are taking care of her. They’re helping, of course, but we know her better than anyone at this point.

I’m proud to be her daughter. I realized just how much I look and act like her when I stuck my tongue out at the surveillance cameras at TJ Maxx today. I could see myself doing it, since there was a giant video letting shoppers know they’re being recorded. Who’s watching? Unclear. But they’ve got my image, so I let them know what I think of it. And it astounded me just how much I looked like my mother while doing it.

This rebellious nature is what drew my father to my mother. Which is why it shocked me just how angry he got when I said I wouldn’t take the vaccine, despite NYC mandating it last year.

I am somehow both sentiments.

I knew I wasn’t going to get the shot from the offset. At first it was the notion of “I don’t get flu shots, I’ll take my chances.” And that was probably fine in ‘normal’ parts of the country. But here in New York City it became a religion all its own. First it was not being able to go to a bar without flashing proof of vax, and then it became you can’t even work without it. And when Bill De Blasio announced the private sector mandate as a final “fuck you” to the city he lorded over for eight years, it only stiffened my rebellious hard on, as my own “fuck you” to the government.

It was December 2021. I already had the virus two months prior, so as far as I was concerned, I got my immunity. And I had heard enough anecdotes about what the shot does to you, especially your fertility. So when I called my parents that day and said I still wouldn’t do it, it stymied me hearing my dad say I should, “for the good of the family.”

I screamed. I was in shock. I’ve never cried that hard in my life. “It’s just one little shot,” he kept shouting through my wails and tears. “How could you say that to me?!” I cried back, “My own father!” I know I’m a drama queen but this felt entirely appropriate. I just kept thinking of my future children and how I owed it to them to not complicate my fertility with this drug. “I won’t do it!” I screamed, kneeling on the floor, vomiting up bile on the carpet. I know he was worried I’d lose my job and income, but that seemed like a Three Mile Island as I was facing a Fukushima, if you’ll pardon the bad taste comparison. I could get another job, I can’t get another hospitable womb.

How quickly we forget.

A week later, the president of my company assured me no one would be fired because of the mandate, even though the company was complying. I did have to test every day for six months, but at this point, I’m not angry about it. I’m not even upset by anything any of us went through. Because we all saw it. We experienced it. And we will never let them do it ever again.

I typed “coup” into Bing and this was what came up.

All these news stories coming out showing just how embedded the government is with every aspect of American life is a good thing. I know it can seriously blackpill people, and I don’t blame them. It can make a person feel helpless and scared that these institutions are so powerful, they can get away with anything. It’s because they did get away with it. Until now.

That’s just how we have to think about it going forward. It’s all been exposed and their trickery cannot work anymore. The rebellion happens by telling these people “no.” Or bullying them on social media. Whichever is easier. As far as I’m concerned, they burned their own house down, so now we must rebuild with what we know works, and what goes against our American values. This is the only bipartisan effort we need, to bring ‘both’ sides together to find our middle ground. We’ve forgotten that existed because they psyopped us into thinking it doesn’t. I can say that comfortably because it’s what happened.

Now we know. Now we move from this point forward. The past is gone, dead and buried in a hail of nuclear fire. The future is nice to look forward to, but if we do not build strong foundations in the present, there will be no future for any of us. Just like I tell my dad every time he gets upset with my mom: she doesn’t remember what happened. She’s only in the present. As far as she’s concerned, nothing happened. So act like nothing did, process your feelings, and keep moving forward.

She’s still a rebel at heart. That’s what I’m taking with me to the next generation.

Merry Christmas, everyone.

From my off-the-grid life to yours.

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