Sometimes we can’t help it; we’re curious about what others think of us. Though I’ll agree that other people’s opinions shouldn’t be our main focal point, it’s okay to assess how others see you from time to time. And it’s hard to pin down just how I come across sometimes, since there’s so many different avenues I take with my online persona.
I feel like I feel everything all at once. Thee’s rarely any consistency to my thoughts. I’m never particularly sad, nor angry, nor happy, I’m just a grab bag of emotions. But more often than not, especially this year, I’ll make sure to do things with a smile rather than a frown. It just feels good to be positive. Wallowing in sadness and self-pity is boring after months of being a sopping wet crybaby. Putting on a smile makes my day job that much easier as well.
When it’s your duty to peddle fear and outrage to the viewing public, you have to learn to take yourself and your personal opinions out of things. And when there’s widespread panic from the non-newsroom folks, I find that my level of outrage falls far short of matching theirs. I think that serves as the catalyst for people to sometimes think I’m cold and uncaring, when that’s the furthest thing from the truth.
There’s several memes that exist online where people will tell you, “If you’re not angry about this story, then you’re not paying attention.” Well, what if you are paying attention and you just can’t afford to be angry? As the days fall off the calendar, I’m finding less and less things to waste my anger or energy on. When things are completely out of my control, I think it’s okay to leave them in the hands of those more capable. And even though we may not agree on who is doing a good job and who is not, we’ve set a precedent for ourselves this year where we will no longer tolerate poor standards of workmanship.
The bar was raised somewhere in 2017. We’re more inclined to take action over things we disagree with, rather than sitting back and mulling over why things aren’t better. It’s an uphill climb and there’s always things to be upset at. But the baseless anger is starting to dissolve. When it’s time for me to actually get angry at something, I’ll be sure to be there and join the fight. Until then, I prefer sitting on my own little blissfully ignorant shelf, observing the various tussles through my rose-colored glasses, hoping and wishing everyone walks away from the scraps with their best selves intact.
Now if you don’t mind, I’ll be pulling a Taylor Swift by saying that 2017 has been a good year for me. Sorry not sorry.